It has come to my attention that a few people are unsure of what a "friend" really means. This number of people seems to be increasing day by day. They let these so-called 'friends' do what they want while still caring for them. That is not right.
As a true friend, I am here to tell you some key traits that a 'friend' does not have. You may think since I am a blogger trying to get you to read, follow and subscribe to my blog that I am not a friend but I am. As a true friend, I will not scam you or take your money (unless you donate to my blog) and I will also come to your blog to follow, read, subscribe if you leave the link in the comments.
This post is meant to help you gain insight into bad people. You deserve good people around you. I can tell you a person is bad but what you do about that person is up to you. I do hope you learn something from this. I will also be telling you what to do about these toxic people.
What you do is up to you. I am just trying to help you realize who is toxic.
1. If your friend only talks to you when you have money
This means that your friend may be using you for the money. This does not mean they are taking your actual real money. This means they have status problems and only care for people of certain money status
2. If your friend always wants something from you
This means that the person is using you for something. Maybe it is money or it could be something as simple as a ride
3. If your friend says 'we are done' over stupid things
For example- 'we are done' when you say that you don't have something that the friend wants
4. Your friend makes you feel guilty when you can't give them something they want
When you can't offer something they want, they will say something like "Oh so you are not my friend because you won't ... for me" This is sometimes followed by #3. This person is manipulative
5. This person will accuse you of doing things you are not
For example- the person saying that you are dating someone who you are not. No matter how many times you tell them you are not, they will bring this up over and over again.
6. This person will not let you have a relationship even though they may be in one
This is a sign of control. They say they will fight anyone who wants to date you. When you do start dating someone, this person will end the friendship. They want to be the only one in your life and will not accept anyone taking you from them
7. This person spies or has people spying on you
How does this person know you had company?? They have friends who are spying on you. These 'friends' of theirs may lie about what they see you doing which in turns makes the person accuse you of doing something you are not
8. You find that things are missing when you leave your friend alone in your house
'Where did the $5 go??' You remember ... was over and you left them alone in your kitchen since you had to use the bathroom. The $5 was on the counter. You want to believe that the ... did not take the money. You want to believe you did not put the $5 on the counter. Though you remember that things seem missing whenever your friend is alone. Hmm
Check out this book if you would like more help
What to do when you see that your friend is toxic
1. Change yourself-
Stop letting this person take things from you or use you. You have the right to say NO. Stop letting them take advantage of you.
2. Confront this person-
You want to make sure the person knows that what they are doing is hurting your feelings.
Now the person may not think what they are doing is wrong or they may even think you are saying this to end the friendship. Stand your ground and don't make this person think you are the problem
3.. Give the person time to change-
Change is hard but if this person really cares for you then they will change. This is not an excuse to keep them doing what they are doing to you. It is a chance for them to change on their own before you take the next step
4. Exit the friendship-
If this person can not change or if this person won't accept what you are saying to them then kick them to the curb. You don't need or deserve to be in a friendship like this.
Ending the friendship will hurt for some time but in the end and future, it is worth it. You will find real friends
Conclusion
Real friends won't take advantage of you
Real friends will change
Real friends will care for you
Real friends are hard to come by but are real and you will find them
50 Comments
Life is too short to put up with toxic people. I think it's important to keep your life free of toxic elements. You only have so much time on this planet.
ReplyDelete1000000% true Stacie xx
DeleteIt can be so hard to break free of toxic people but it is so important to do - life is too short.
ReplyDeleteYes it can be Mandy. I have seen many people keep with toxic people because they want to see the 'good' in people. It is important for mental state to reid of these people xx
DeleteI've definitely had my fair share of toxic relationships. Luckily, I've separated myself from most of them.
ReplyDeleteI am so sorry to hear that but I am also glad that you were able to seperate yourself from those people xx
DeleteI think everyone has had a bit of a toxic friendship at some point in their lives. As you say the trick is to identify it and do something about it.
ReplyDeleteIt can be easy to identify it but hard to do something but it is best for everyone's mental health xx
DeleteSometimes it takes an outsider to make us see sense. It's not always easy to admit that you're in a toxic anything, all the more to take action.
ReplyDeleteThis is true, Nora. Sometimes the person with the toxic friend does not even want to hear it from an outsider. Which can be irritating even more xx
DeleteToxic people are hard to deal with, never easy. I agree we should get rid of them to be happy and healthy
ReplyDeleteYes you get it Lyosha!!!!! xx
Deletewe all have toxic people, some of them come in forms of family and that is hard to distance yourself from. so be true to yourself and cut ties when necessary
ReplyDeleteHopefully that toxic person will learn and not do it to other's xx
DeleteSo important to recognize the signs especially as you get older. We have all be through this...it hurts but weeding out your life is necessary for a healthy one.
ReplyDeleteYes Catherine. I think as we age, we see and know the signs more. Makes it harder if they have been our friends for a long time xx
DeleteThese are all great tips to keep in mind when developing friendships; great advice, indeed!
ReplyDeleteThank you very much Sara. I am glad you enjoyed it xx
DeleteI agree 100% on your tips. I had a friend who did none of these things; however. She was just a horribly, nasty person and I am thankfully not friends with her any longer!
ReplyDeleteOh that is awful Beth, but I am glad you got done with her. You for sure do not need her. I do hope she learns from her mistakes to be a better person xx
DeleteGreat article. Would pass it on to my teenager kid for reiterating the facts.
ReplyDeleteI am glad you like it and will show your teenager. I do hope she does not have to deal with toxic people Sonal xx
DeleteThis is a really helpful post and may help some to identify toxic friendships that they hadn't realised were toxic. It is so important to know the signs. I now know some of my past friendships were toxic and am glad to be rid of them.
ReplyDeleteI am glad you liked it, Leah. I am also glad you got rid of those people xx
Deletethats what they say, if it's toxic, let it go! i just did. :p
ReplyDeleteYou got that right!!!!
DeleteThis sounds a lot like an ex I had... and a few friends... no use for them!
ReplyDeleteOh haha glad he is your ex, Kita xx
DeleteThese are definitely some red flags. This is an important list of things to look at.
ReplyDeleteI am glad you liked it xx
DeleteFriendships can definitely turn on you as you get older. Your goals may change from one another or you may just have different views on things. This is such an important reminder!
ReplyDeleteBeyond true Becca. That is something to also consider. A toxic friend can be someone who just does not support you xx
DeleteI have so many friends ad I am so glad they were all good and don't have any signs of being a toxic one.
ReplyDeleteYou are a lucky one, Alexandra. Keep those friends close xx
DeleteI am so happy that I ahve friend who are very supportive. Thank you for sharing this. This is very important to know especialy when you ahve new circles of friends.
ReplyDeleteI am glad you liked it. Keep those supportive friends close xx
DeleteThank goodness that my toxic friends eliminated themselves!
ReplyDeleteThat is amazing Felecia. That is a very rare thing to happen xx
Delete"Real friends won't take advantage of you" such wise words and in the past my mummy has been dropped when she hasn't any money, people have stole from her and used her. Now she finds it hard to trusy anyone x
ReplyDeleteI love this quote. Thank you for sharing it xx
DeleteToxic people are the absolute worst and can polute your energy. Great post on how to recognize and exit!
ReplyDeleteThey so are!! Thank you for liking it xx
DeleteToxic people are the absolute worst and can polute your energy. Great post on how to recognize and exit!
ReplyDeleteThanks a ton Mimi xx
DeleteThese are all spot on! I always have to remind myself its best to move on from them and start fresh!
ReplyDeleteThank you. Yes Emily, move on and start fresh since you deserve to find great friends
DeleteToxic relationships are so dangerous if you let them into your life. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteWay true Miss J xx
ReplyDeleteIt can be hard to walk away from a toxic friendship, but recognising the signs is an important first step
ReplyDeleteThey will have unlimited oversight, you will have zero control, and the relationship will be totally crazy. Signs of toxic relationships
ReplyDelete