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Jun 18, 2019

8 Important Ways to be Sure You Are Safe in the World of BDSM

June 18, 2019 0 Opinions

*This post is sponsored and talks about sex*

Hey friends and welcome back to my blog.
I know you have heard of 50 Shades of Grey popular book series turned into movie 2011-2018. If you have not then you don't have tv or are lying. The book is based on rich guy Christian Grey who finds a young girl Anastasia Steele. Their romance blossoms and we learn Christian likes to push the pain and boundaries of sexual relations often being dominant. As the series goes on, we see both their sexual and romantic relationship evolve into kids/marriage and more sadomasochistic aka s&m.

When the movie came out, so did more and more people couples to learn about s&m. Some women not telling their husbands their desire to be in this kind of relationship due to embarrassment or religious values.

Since this topic is becoming more and more mainstream, I thought it would be a  great time to talk about it.

So today we are talking about tips and unknown facts about subs and doms aka submissive and dominate sexual relations. Bdsm is supposed to be  fun but there are some precaution that you need to know. Let's get started

*Have you ever tried bdsm? Don't be afraid to say yes*

1.  Have a safe word you both agree on

    This one of the most important aspect of bdsm play. This will make sure things are safe

2.  Be respectful of the person. If they use their safe word or say No then stop

3.  Be on the lookout for potential abuse both emotional and physical.
   If the person uses the safe word or says No and the other person does not stop, that could mean physical abuse.

  If your partner can't associate between playtime and regular time is then there could be something wrong

4.  Don't do anything you are uncomfortable with

   No one is forcing you to do anything. If they are then that is abuse. Make sure to use the word No. It is a word that is made to be used.

  You know what you are comfortable with and what you are not. Which also goes along with #5

5. Be open about your likes and dislikes
  You know what you like and you don't. The other person does not. To make it more fun, be sure to be open.

 Say if you like to be gagged to tied up. Say if you don't like to be tied up

6.  Wear a bell during if a safe word can not be used

  For example when you are being gagged. This is another form of safety. You need to be able to express when you don't want to do something anymore.

7.  Research about the topic before trying it

    That way you know sort of what you are getting yourself into.

 This could be could to do with your partner also. If you two are new to bdsm, then looking it up could help make it more fun

8.  Have fun

  Bdsm is supposed to be fun. Femdom dating is supposed to be fun. Don't be afraid to try new things. Sex is supposed to be fun. We all do it even animals, bugs and nature.

There you have it friends. A few tips on safety. There are many more things in bdsm that I did not include like contracts and other safety tips.

Jun 16, 2019

Top Facts about Autism you Need to Know Right Now

June 16, 2019 0 Opinions

*This is a guest post by Wrae Sanders. Make sure you go follow her social media and blog. Links will be down at the end of the post

Autism is on a full spectrum, not just a flat diagnosis. Those who have autism
have traits that vary from being non-verbal (not being able to speak) and
requiring total care (help with feeding, dressing, and other daily needs) to
living daily life like most others around them, just with a few "quirks".

I don't have autism.
My son does. He's 12 and is fully verbal. He has struggled with a meltdown,
social skills, and sensory issues over the years. Thanks to therapy and
medication (for ADHD, his other diagnosis) he is doing well.
I've worked with kids that do.
Once you meet a child (or adult) with autism, it will change you.

What if I don't know a lot about autism?

There's a lot to know about autism and I still have a lot to learn. This is okay.
What's not okay, however, is shaming someone for having autism and/or their
behaviors. They literally cannot help it. This happens more than we realize.

There are basic facts to learn that can go a long way.

1.Autism is not caused by vaccines. Lots of people still believe this one. The
study that stated so has been debunked and the doctor who led the
study lost his medical license. Autism is an organic brain disorder. This
means that while in the womb, changes occur in a child's brain that
cause autism. There is currently no way to change this, but your child
can receive help starting at a very early age.

2. If a child is non-verbal, it does not mean they can't express themselves or
read how you feel. Kids are smart, and these kids are brilliant. Just because they can't speak doesn't mean they don't know what's going on around them. I learned this first hand while working at a mental health
facility. There are two units dedicated to kids with autism, and many of
them were non-verbal, requiring total care. The kids could tell who loved working with them and who didn't. They absorb emotions like the rest of us. One girl would grin and squeeze arms as a way of communication

3. It's important to have both parents/caregivers on the same page about a
child's care. Once a child is diagnosed with autism, both parents/ caregivers need to take time to process. It's a life-changer.

Some go into denial, some feel relief. Everyone feels differently. The
problems begin when the adults involved disagree on the child's care or
how to handle things. My son's diagnosis almost ruined my marriage. I
was close to filing for a divorce in 2013, but my husband finally
understood the need to engage with our son and help me deal.

4. Once you're inside the world of a child with autism, cherish it. Many kids
on the spectrum, my son included, don't enjoy small talk and have a
hard time making friends. It takes work and patience to get inside their
world- learn about their interests, go at their pace getting to know them.
You'll know when they are done talking.

5. Be ready for surprises. My son has been full of these. Many people think
that people with autism don't have emotions. They do- sometimes they
don't show them well, which we misinterpret. Empathy can be a difficult
lesson to teach (it has been at my house), so look for opportunities
when possible. Ask "what would you do" questions.

These tips are meant to get you started in the world of a child on the
spectrum. There's so much more to see and learn.


Wrae Sanders 
Blogger, Copy Writer and Editor 
Facebook: Facebook.com/WraeMeredithBlogs 
Instagram: @shortstackblogs 

Jun 11, 2019

8 Keys To A Successful Life

June 11, 2019

Bill Gates. Beyonce. Name of a billionaire or millionaire. They all know the keys to a successful life. You too could have the knowledge of what these brilliant minds know.

Hey friends and welcome back to my blog.
You can have the secrets also. I have been reading about many rich people came to their success. Let me tell you something first, it takes a lot of hard work. These people did not come into richess overnight. Nor have they stopped working just because they reached their goals

 If you have been lacking the motivation or how do succeed, then be sure to keep reading
 Make your dreams come true. Get the life you know you deserve.

Tell me down in the comments what your main key to success is? Is it different then what I have written down. What is the main key? Let's keep this conversation going

Hard work

      The most important key I think. Most things in life don't come easy. Did Beyonce get where she is by slacking off?? Did Michael Jordan?? Did Michael Jackson or Bill Gates?? NO.

In order to be the best, you have to do the work. You have to work harder than the rest.

Don't stop working hard just because you reached your goal. Work as hard.

Just make sure to take breaks. All work and no play will make you go crazy.


   You may not know how to get there, but you know what you want. Don't let anything or anyone get in your way of getting there.


     You must always believe in yourself. There will be those around you who say that you are a fool but don't listen to them. Show them and prove them wrong.

Have confidence in yourself. You may not get see the finish line quick, but there will be one.

Always be nice to others even if they are trying to put you down. Good karma


     Keep learning about anything and everything that has to do with your end goal. Ask people for advice. Never be afraid to learn more things. Try to learn something new everyday

Never Be Afraid to Fail

   I got news for you that you may not want to hear, You Will Fail. You will fail more than once. They key is to not be afraid when it happens.

Beyonce has failed. Michael Jordan has failed. Everyone has failed because no one is perfect. No one will be successful on their first try.


    Use what you learned to help others


   You can be successful but it wont matter without love in your life. It does not have to be a boyfriend/girlfriend. It could be family, friends or even pets.

What is the point of having it all when there is no one there to cheer you on? Never back down on friends or family members who have stuck by you. Don't make the fame or fortune go to your head

Read my post 8 top ways to tell if you have a toxic friendship

Always have more goals

  Don't stop working just because you got rich or reached your goals. Instead continue to work hard and form new goals.

Bill Gates is the richest man in American, has he stopped after that title?
Beyonce has gained so much success and is very rich, does she sit at home with her kids and money?

No since successful people know that it is never over. They always have something new to achieve, something new to learn.

Here are some books about success in life *not sponsored*

Jun 2, 2019

The Truth About Animals and Mental Health

June 02, 2019 9 Opinions

Hey friends and welcome back to my blog.

  So it is no secret that humans have a great deal of mental health issues. Did you know that your furry friends could also suffer from the same mental health issues??  Yes, it is true.

 Know I was going to get into how I know my pup Kobe has various mental health issues and why I am the cause for some but I decided not to. I was Google about animals and mental health and found this article where it talks about mental health in various animals and how they deal with it.
The article and the fact this is a repost of a post I did where it got a lot of comments, made me want to talk even more about it. I think it is time we stand up for the animals who get a hard time just as much as we stand up for the people who get a hard time.

 What humans get as mental health may not be in the same sense as what animals get. They are similar in many sense though. 

For example- our furry friends of course feel anxious and stress. Just look at a dog during a thunderstorm.

An abused animal can have depression and post-traumatic stress disorder. This is shown when going to get a pet from a shelter. Their unwillingness to come to any human thinking that all humans are evil. This due to their prior torture from their owners.

Suicide and self-harm has also been seen in our furry friends. This article tells of a dog in 1845 that had been acting odd for a few days before trying to drown himself. He kept his head under the water for so long that when found, he was dead. Heartbreaking but true. Wikipedia also suggests that not just furry friends and human but insects also commit suicide.

Birds will pluck their feathers in an attempt to self-harm. Here if you scroll down to 'Other Animals' you will see some examples of animal self-harm. Don't worry, it is not graphic.

In time and with effort, these animals much like humans, can be taken care of. If you know the signs in humans then you will have an idea of what to look for in animals. When you are informed, you can help not only yourself but others around you including your furry friends.

There has been researched that plants can feel happiness and sadness when the sun goes away or is out. Not human typical depression but feelings none the less.
Did you know that when you cut grass, the smell is from the grass trying to repair itself from the injury it just got? How sad it that? Really makes you think about cutting grass again.

Not to mention plants can truly feel things about the environment. Like in the movie  The Happening the trees create neurotoxins. Those neurotoxins cause humans brain to think they must make the human commit suicide.
We as humans, think that animals are just dumb, cute things. In reality they have a lot of the same emotions as us. Alot of them are even way smarter then we humans are. Alot of them going extinct would cause devastation around the Earth  

Want to read more BBC Earth article

I hope you are now more informed of just how serious mental health is. How it should be talked about and how being informed is important. I do hope this post shed a little light on a topic many do not talk about. Be sure to keep a closer eye on your human and furry friends. You never know who is hurting inside. 
Also make sure you take care of the Earth as you don't want to cause the trees or plants to go all crazy on us.  Thank you for reading

May 24, 2019

Dating for Friendship

May 24, 2019 14 Opinions


Hey friends and welcome back to my blog. Today we shall be diving into this quote i found that I love. It has me thinking of life and our pursuit of love. Summer is close and many of us will be looking for that summer fling“

We love because it’s the only true adventure.”Nikki Giovanni

What does this quote mean to you?

To me it means that love is an adventure. Which is very true. It can be an adventure of fun and happiness. Or one of heartbreak and lessons.

We go on casual nostringsdating net for fun and to find if another person is compatible with us. We don't relize that we could be finding a best friend instead of a lover.

We can imagine many movies having plots like this. In the movie 'Greace'  Danny and Sandy find each other on summer vacation and have a little fling. Once summer is over, they imagine that their fling was to be over. Well they were wrong. We see them meet up in high school when Sandy transfers. The summer fling eventually turns out to be a lasting love and friendship between the two.

Then we have the movie 'No Strings Attached,' casual sex dating between friends. That is all it was supposed to be but then the friends wind up falling for each other. This shows that we can find love in unexpected ways. Between someone whoum we never thought was possible.

Causal dating can lead to a relationship that ends with nothing but friendship. I am reminded of the show 'Friends' where Joey and Rachel are friends, date and become friends again. 

It can happen if a breakup is mutual.. and there is no hard feelings.  You may be saying 'yeah to the lucky ones' Which is very true. You have to have a great friendship in the start to be able to be friends after a breakup. It can happen though.

There are twist and turns in love just like in any adventure. Opening up your heart to another is one of the most terrifying yet rewarding thing a person can do. It is an adventure of digging deep in the soul to relize that you deserve love.  You can go in to find love then come out with a best friend. You can go in and find heartbreak like never before. There is no map or book to guide you or tell you if it will work with John.

You, your soul and your heart go on this adventure alone. You have to decide wether or not to take the risk. No one should tell you who to date. It is your life and you adventure to go on. It is you lesson to learn. That ks what is great about adventures, no matter what it is there is always a lesson to be learnt.
I love where things teach you a lesson.
I guess what I have to offer for you on this post is to remind you to Have Fun when dating. It is an adventure that we all take. Even animals have their way of dating.
Don't go into a date thinking that it end in one or 2 ways. Since a date can end in many ways. You just have to be open to taking the adventure. Hopefully this post made sense and was not just a bunch of gibberish.

Here is to you finding love, happinesses and enjoying the adventure of life. See you next time.

May 19, 2019

How to be Successful at Dating Over 40

May 19, 2019 5 Opinions

Hey friends and welcome back to my blog. 

Fathers always say to daughters 'you can't date until 50'. As kids, we like to disobey our parents. Not to mention teen puberty and thinking everyone is cute. When we turn adults, we realize that maybe dad was correct because dating can be just awful. 

The asking someone out, first dates, kiss or no... The breakups can just destroy someone's self esteem. Like I said it can be wicked hard. Kids take warning and listen to your parents. 

 Over 50 dating is even worse. People think when you are that age, you have to have life all figured out. Sometimes you don't even at the age of 90. If you don't have it figured out then people will just write you off as being a loser or failure. Which I can promise you that you are not. Life is harder then dating. 

When an older person looks younger, they attract younger mates. Younger mates tend to think that since you are older, you have money. They will play games to get you to date them. Then they will start taking advantage of you and your money. If you don't have the money to support this person, then it would be over quick. They will go looking for someone else. 

 I have some tips to be safer. These are things I have learned from watching my mom date. Advise that my mom has given me about dating.

1. Be sure to go to a public place for a date
   This will make sure that you are safe. You never know really who is lying about their age online or even a serial killer

2. Get to know this person

  Speople are not always what they seem. People can be nice just to get you attracted to them. Then in a few months, their real personalities start to appear.
 Maybe you discover this person who said had a job lied and is actually too lazy or wants you to pay for them

3. Be honest but don't tell this person everything

    Sure you want to say to your potential mate that you have kids. However, you don't need to tell your life story. Nor do you have to tell this person all your family's name. Keep the important things private.

4. If you can, get a background check on your potential mate

    This will help you not be scammed and can save your life. This also will help you on the first date since you know if this person is lying about anything. They say that they have not committed a crime but you know they have. You will know if they are lying about their age or if they are married.
Just be sure not to tell that you did a background check on them before or during the first date. I mean you can but it might end the date

5. Don't trust too easy

  Sure John has beautiful eyes that make the sky jealous but that doesn't mean he can be trusted. Everyone has skeletons in their closet. John may be married or may be taken advantage of you. You will be sure to regret it if you trust him before you get too know him well enough.

6. Lower your standards a bit
  I know this is hard as you still want that special someone. However, you never know that special someone could be the opposite of what you want. Not to mention mature dating is hard.  So be a little more open to different people.

That is all I have for this post today. It is ok to be single over the age of 40 or any age. It is ok to not have it all together. You will find that certain someone just be a bit more open. Have fun in dating but do be sure to keep safe


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